Pardon me, darling?

What did one just say to one's face?

*This is Hugh Bonneville from Downton Abbey, but this also happens to be my exact facial expression during said conversation explained below*

So the other weekend something funny happened. One of the mums from school told me that my accent "wasn't that British". We were just having a casual chat, when the topic of me being British came up, and she came out with this beautiful one-liner. I was really confused - because I was born and brought up in England, and I have a British accent (not very surprising). And here I was thinking that the only qualification to have a British accent was indeed be born and brought up there, but apparently the correct British accent- as informed to me by a non-British mum - was a "the one from Downton Abbey". *heh, cue me staring into her soul and debating internally which version of ‘what the fuck’ to say out loud, *heeeh*

For context, my kid goes to a British international school where English is the main language spoken for teaching. Basically what this lovely woman (she is genuinely very nice) who is from Ukraine explained to me was that she was surprised I didn’t have a ‘proper’ British accent, if I grew up in England. And that that ‘proper’ accent is a posh one. Duh.

I should add that I am the only parent in my kid's school class who is British, so this was..a…rather…bitter pill to swallow. I happen to have quite a neutral British accent with a clip of Northen in it, perhaps, but there really is no debating that I have one of the many accents that make up the British spectrum of accents. It’s just the world outside of the UK thinks there’s only one type - and it’s the one that shows up in palaces, stately homes and large estates with hunting rooms (I imagine). Everyone who sounds like they’re from, let’s say, Newcastle, Northern Ireland, Bristol, Scotland, Manchester are just not doing British right. Didn’t you know? Don’t worry, I very directly educated her that there are many types of British accent and she really shouldn’t say that out loud again. That’s an inside thought darling.

Living in Spain for one year and being in & around British international schools in this time, I now realise something new - what quite a lot of immigrant or “expat”-type parents want for their kids when sending them to such a school, is not just a good level of English, but a British accent. But they only know one British accent and they want that one. Yknow the posh one - R.P. (received pronunciation) - think Downton Abbey, Prince William, Surrey West London. Do not think Emmerdale, The Only Way is Essex or Love Island. In fact, some of those parents might just turn around and accuse you of not sounding British, even when you literally grew up there and they literally...did not. *Weeps into cucumber sandwich and tea*

I had no idea this kind of thinking existed and as much as this is frustrating to hear as an offhand comment, it's another notch in the belt of learning as I live abroad! I never shy from correcting people’s random incorrect assumptions - and I try not to hold it against them either. I can’t imagine the amount of dumb shit that I have assumed about other nationalities, just bopping along and happy in my blissful ignorance. Be-beddy-boo, bop bop bop.

Now I think for my next party trick, I will adopt a Liverpool accent at the next parents meeting and see where that gets me 💯🔥😊